My Escape

Going to church honestly takes me to a new world. It's as if i can let reality take a pause and just praise The Lord. And learn about him, and learn how to better myself as a person it's just a great place to be. I love how my Pastor says before service "There is nothing more important you could be doing right now, than giving back to God" Oh my gosh I almost didn't capitalize the 'G' in God, and then I thought, "The absolute LEAST thing I could do for him, is spell his name with a capital." To be honest, I don't know if I loved tonight's service as much as I normally do, but I do know that I have a new thing to think about for a week. And that just inspires me in itself. The only thing that bugs me is, that I don't go to church on Sundays. Which I should. I feel so guilty about it. Because I'm just selfish. The only excuse's for not wanting to go on Sunday is that 1.I don't wanna get up early, 2.I don't want it to Intrude on my weekends, like if I'm having a sleepover, and lastly 3. I'm kinda nervous... That sounds so dumb, I mean who gets nervous about going to church? Well I do. The reasoning behind the is that I feel so undereducated when it comes to religion, and so when I go to church on Sunday, I feel that I'll be the odd one out, or I won't know what's going on. And I hate that feeling. I will ask a MILLION questions until I understand what I'm doing. That's one characteristic about myself I am not ashamed of. I mean if you don't understand something, why wouldn't you want to ask questions? I would love to hear someone's reasoning to that. Anyway back to Sunday church, In the end i just think I'm lazy, and exclude myself from church Sunday on a very selfish and unrealistic level.